Oh. my. goodness. So, recently, Kalin has decided to show his displeasure by screaming at us. We won't let him play with the remote. He screams and cries. We pull him away from the trash can. He screams and cries. He wants to get our attention. He screams and cries. I don't shovel the food into his mouth fast enough. He screams and cries. He wants to nurse. He screams and cries while head-butting my chest and/or hitting my chest with his hand. Some of these situations can be remedied by teaching sign language. Which is what I've decided to do. My sister has had some success with her 9 month old and my sister-in-law has used it with both of her children with great success. I'm hoping by teaching Kalin how to sign "eat", "more", and "milk" some of the screaming will be avoided.
Part of my frustration lies in the fact that Kalin can see me getting his food ready. I can even be sitting right in front of him with his food, ready to feed him, and he'll start screaming and crying with HUGE tears streaming down his face. This morning he even did it while he was half-way done eating his food. I guess I paused for too long between bites. I sat there watching him scream and wondered why, at 10 months, he was acting like a newborn who hasn't learned anything about his world and the way it works. I told him that I wasn't going to treat him like a newborn, letting him know that I wasn't going to respond to that kind of a tantrum. I waited until he calmed down a bit before feeding him more food. I know that he's not fully able to grasp what I was saying and we're not fully at the age of being able to punish behavior like that, but I also don't have to jump up and respond to or obey his every cry. The other day, during one particularly frustrating meal/clean-up, I told Kasey that I felt more like Kalin's servant than his mom. He screamed and expected me to respond in a certain way. I think, at 10 months, we can begin to change that way of thinking and try to avoid that kind of behavior.
I'm not an expert in childhood development so if any of you who have either had kids or taken these type of classes can shed some insight as to what I can and cannot expect from Kalin at this age, I would be most appreciative. I don't want to expect too much from him thereby frustrating both of us, but I also don't want to use the excuse of "He's just a baby still" thereby letting these behaviors continue on into toddler-hood or even further.
I keep wondering if this is a little glimpse of things to come. While I may be able to stop this type of behavior for a little bit, what's it going to be like when he's 2 or 3 and becoming even more independent. Oh dear. We could be in for a rough ride. The time has come and gone where our main purpose was Kalin's comfort and survival. Now the more difficult, but hopefully even more rewarding, aspects of parenting begin.
2 comments:
by the time he's 2 or 3 I'm pretty sure I'll be all for hog-tying the boy or duct taping him to the wall.
I know I'm kind late in responding, and I'm not a mom yet, but I've spent many days "parenting" Macy in that stage of life. She knew "no" and knew when she was acting in a way that was "yucky". She was spanked... well, her hand smacked, at 7 months and she knew why. The twins now are doing a thing that they get fod in their mouth and then push air through pursed lips, that blubbering thing... and so they go on "eating time-outs", they are skipped in taking bites and they know why... the blubbering stops and they eat fine the rest of the time. Enter... visible signs of Kalin's sin nature... I'll be prayin' for you!
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